♥ Thursday, March 13, 2008
Dear mummy,
I am in heaven now, sitting on jesus's lap. He love me and cries with me, for my heart has been broken. I so wanted to be your little girl.
I don't quite understnad what has hapen. i was so exicted when i began realising my existance. i was in a dark yet comfortable place. I saw i had fingers & toes. i was pretty far along in my developing, yet not near ready to leave my surrounding. I spent most of my time thinking or sleeping.
Even from my earliest days, i felt a special boning between you and me sometimes i heard you crying and i cried with you sometimes you would yell and scream then cry. i heard daddy yelling back. i was sad,and hope you would be better soon i wondered why you cried so much.
One day you cried almost all the day i hurt for you. I couldn't imagine why you were so unhappy. That same day, the most horrible thinghappened. A very mean monster came ino that warm, comfortable place i was in. i was so scared, i began screaming,but you never once tried to help me. Maybe you never heard me. The monster get closer and closer as i was screaming, "mummy, mummy, help me please mummy, help me."
Complete terror is all i felt. i screamed and screamed until i thought i couldn't anymore. Then the monster started ripping my arm off. It hurt sp bad, the pain i can never expalin. It didn't stop. OH, how i begged it to stop. I screamed in horror asit ripped off my leg. Though i was in such complete pain, i was dying. i knew would never see your face or hear you say how much you love me.
I wanted to make your tears go away, i had so many plans to make you happy. Now, i couldn't, all y dreams are shattered. Thoug i was in utter pain nd horror, i felt the pain of my heart breaking, above all. i wanted more than anything to be your daughter. no use now, for i was dying a painful death. i could only imagine the terrible things that they had done to you.
I wanted to tell you that i love you before i was gone, but i didn't know the words you could understand.and sonn, i no longer had the breath to say them, i was dead. i felt myself rising. I was being carried by a huge angel into a bi beautiful place. i was still crying but the physical pain was gone.
The angel took me to jesus and set me on His lap. He said he loved me, and He was my father. then i was happy. I asked Him what the thing was that killed me. He answered" Abortion. I m sorry, my child, for i know how it feels." i don't know what abortion is: i guess that's the name of the monster.
I'm writting to say that i love you and tell you hw much i wanted to be your little gal. i tried very hard to live. i wanted to live, i have the will but i couldn't, the monster was too powerful. It suck my arms and legs off and finally got all of me. It was impossible to love i just wanted you to know i tried to stay with you. i didn't want todie.
Also, mummy please watch out for that abortion monster.Mummy, i love you and i would hate for you to go through the kind of pain. please be careful.
Love,
you baby
